Now that I have decided to do this, I don’t know where to start from and I also a feel tiny bit nervous. Well, that’s kind of to be expected or not. Whatever!
I will be turning 21 in a few weeks’ time and I know it might not be a big deal for some people because they passed that stage some seven years, two years, I don’t know how many years ago. Well, the age is really not the big deal but what it represents to me personally.
I remember some four years back, a senior colleague of mine was going to be 21 and he started this appreciation series about everything that made up 21 for him and I remember saying to myself that when I turned 21 I was going to celebrate, be happy and hundred shades of grateful.
Unfortunately, last year struck; I really don’t want to be ungrateful but last year was sort of really bad for me, it hit me at my lowest and it hit me really, really bad. So in the midst of it I just kept wondering how I could ever celebrate 21 with as much gusto and joy and happiness as I planned. I was very depressed and nothing made me so happy, I basically put up a lot of happy and smiling appearances everywhere but I was far from happy.
It was in that down state I found writing, I still keep saying that is the best thing that ever happened to me. Funny though, I had been writing since I was a kid, I remember I gave out a novel to be published when I was 12 or 13, now that I look back at it I wonder what I wrote there. Point is, I had always been writing but I think maybe because of the state I was in last year it became dearer to me. No, it became everything to me.
Then came the turning point. It was towards the end of the year and everything changed. I found a friend who helped me through the darkness, he was and still is an angel, a very beautiful soul that I love dearly. I keep saying God used him to crawl my way out of the depths of despair. And all of a sudden 21 didn’t seem so bad anymore.
So I made up my mind to celebrate with my writing. I decided to write an anthology, not necessarily just on my life but on everything that has made my life, lessons learnt, experiences gained, mine and that of others, stories I hold dearly and the extremes of my mind. I decided that I will care for little or no rules of poetry or fiction or writing, I will write as me and exactly what I want to write. Basically I decided to pour out the depths of my soul into the anthology, hold back no emotions and care little as I have always done about what anyone would think of me. I called this soul pouring “PHOENIX T21”.
Well, I am still in the process of writing it, every piece is very dear to me and honestly I am not really certain when it will be finished but I know it will be definitely some weeks after my birthday. Ohh the birthday is February 8. I pick it up when I am less busy or when I really feeling inspired. It is so dear to me and this is why I have to write it now and at this time. I think I have gotten far sort of but anyways its still moving.
Definitely, I will be sharing excerpts here when I can and other times I might just write my normal stories but whichever way I can’t wait for everyone to see the complete book.
Thank you everyone for encouraging me and pushing me in this journey and making me feel like some sort of bad ass writer. Lol.
Kindly stay with me till the end and much loveeeee
(c)Onashile Peace (tolarnee)